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I might as well get this out in the open. I don't know whether or not this person will actually read this entry but here it goes.
I didn't write the entry planning on you seeing it, but yes I did realize that it was a possiblilty that you would see it. I also assumed you would realize that it was at a time when I was fairly pissed off, and would realize that I was just angry and I didn't really mean most of what I wrote. I'm sorry if the things I wrote in there hurt you. That was never my intent. I just need to get stuff off my chest, and I figured you would understand that. I know that I probably should have made that entry friends only or private but I didn't and I'm sorry for that, I was upset at the time and didn't really think about doing something like that. Also my livejournal is one not many people know about, let alone check so I knew that it would be a fairly private thing and that only people who pretty much knew what was going on would read it any way and they could make thier own decisions on what I said. For the record I never told any one that you made me chose between the two of you. I said that that was how you made me feel. There is a fairly large distinction there. You might not see it, but it's there. I also did not talk a lot of shit about you. The only people I told were Mary, Kaylene, Jeremiah, and Matt, because I needed people to talk to about this and advice on how to deal with it. Whenever I talked to anyone else about it they always would say "so I heard about you and courtney..." and then ask me what my side was and so I'd tell them because that is preferable to them starting rumors about what is going on. When all is said and done I don't think either of us acted very well through any of this, and I don't think either of us are right or wrong. I just know that things have been said and done in the last few days, on both sides, that could make it very hard for us to work together next year, but I plan on trying to make it work if I have to, because it's what needs to be done.
I didn't write the entry planning on you seeing it, but yes I did realize that it was a possiblilty that you would see it. I also assumed you would realize that it was at a time when I was fairly pissed off, and would realize that I was just angry and I didn't really mean most of what I wrote. I'm sorry if the things I wrote in there hurt you. That was never my intent. I just need to get stuff off my chest, and I figured you would understand that. I know that I probably should have made that entry friends only or private but I didn't and I'm sorry for that, I was upset at the time and didn't really think about doing something like that. Also my livejournal is one not many people know about, let alone check so I knew that it would be a fairly private thing and that only people who pretty much knew what was going on would read it any way and they could make thier own decisions on what I said. For the record I never told any one that you made me chose between the two of you. I said that that was how you made me feel. There is a fairly large distinction there. You might not see it, but it's there. I also did not talk a lot of shit about you. The only people I told were Mary, Kaylene, Jeremiah, and Matt, because I needed people to talk to about this and advice on how to deal with it. Whenever I talked to anyone else about it they always would say "so I heard about you and courtney..." and then ask me what my side was and so I'd tell them because that is preferable to them starting rumors about what is going on. When all is said and done I don't think either of us acted very well through any of this, and I don't think either of us are right or wrong. I just know that things have been said and done in the last few days, on both sides, that could make it very hard for us to work together next year, but I plan on trying to make it work if I have to, because it's what needs to be done.
